Day 365 – how did that happen?
This time last year I was probably in one of the darkest places I had ever been. I was sad,
lonely, tired and, because of the enforced Covid lockdown, desperately in need of a simple
hug.
I had been a ‘one or more bottles of wine a day’ drinker for most of the previous 4 decades.
Wine was my best friend, or so I thought, but on reflection it had tainted so much of my life.
Sauvignon Blanc had dominated birthdays, Christmases, anniversaries, weddings, funerals
and every party in between. It had been the cause of broken bones, blackouts, arguments,
poor relationship choices, tears and was definitely a factor in the demise of two marriages.
On June 19th 2020 something flicked a switch. On that day I was invited, as the sole guest in
lockdown, to a friend’s 70th birthday party. I decided to take the only bottle of decent wine
in my house, but before I even left home, I poured myself a glass out of it! What was I
thinking? I couldn’t even wait until I had arrived at the party! Who turns up at a Big Birthday
party with an already opened bottle of wine! It suddenly hit me that afternoon that
something had to change and that was the last glass of wine I drank.
I realised that in theory, at the age of 62, I still have potentially a third of my life left on this
planet. It was too easy to continue the daily pattern of waking up feeling horrible, eat, drink,
fall asleep on the settee, stagger to bed and repeat. This had to change.
I started reading every bit of Quit Lit that I could lay my hands on and this was when I
discovered Over the Influence. I had listened to many podcasts about sobriety but this one
was different – it was funny, emotional, realistic and just an inspiration to listen to. Whilst
painting my kitchen I listened avidly to back-to-back episodes, I bought Shazza, Freddie and
Background Ben a coffee or three and I signed up to the fortnightly zooms. I loved them.
Through these I have made some incredible AF friends for life. They understand exactly
what this is like, how difficult it is to stumble and fumble through so many Day Ones but
also what absolute joy, strength, clarity of thought, purpose to life and overwhelmingly
exciting prospects being alcohol free can mean.
Every AF day has brought with it it’s own challenges. It has never been easy but I’ve made it
to 365. In the past 12 months I have qualified as a Nutrition and Weight Loss advisor,
completed a personal development course, walked over 2000 miles, cycled over 1300 miles
and completed 2 charity rides. I have lost nearly 2 stone in weight, my skin is clearer, my
eyes are brighter and I have never felt happier in my life. None of this would have been
possible if I was still in cohorts with the Wine Witch.
I am so proud of myself and my two grown up kids are so proud of me too – I have even
inspired them to drink AF beers! Without doubt I believe that I am a better mum, sister,
auntie and friend and in September I am going to become, for the first time, the best of
grannies.
I simply cannot wait for the next chapter to begin.
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