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When I first stopped drinking I only planned to do it for 90 days.
Non-drinkers are boring. Alcohol-free life is shit. Why would you do ANYTHING that doesn’t involve drinking?
I’d done various 30 day stints before - usually Sober October which would then kick off in to Knob Head November before rolling into Can’t Remember December.
30 days isn’t enough. Nowhere near. Yes, it’s a decent break from alcohol and, yes, your body will say thank you. But it’s nowhere near enough time for you to fully experience the unexpected joys that sobriety brings.
When I was about 8 months in I was approaching my first sober spring and summer. Friends were making plans. People were booking holidays and there were garden gatherings every other night. I cried. I actually cried. I thought there’s no way I can do this. I can’t survive a summer without booze. It’s literally impossible.
What a load of toss… remove booze and anything is possible. But it’s not easy. You need to put a shit load of effort in!
We are SO conditioned into believing that nothing can be fun unless we’re drinking, tipsy, drunk, half cut, falling over, vomiting to make way for more booze, blacking out and making giant dicks of ourselves in public. Sounds fun, yeah?
Sunshine has always been one of my biggest triggers. I can deal with the stress and shame of losing a family business without turning to booze but the minute the sun appears in the sky my mind would turn to a couple of chilled rosè wines. Bottles, not glasses.
So how DO you tackle a booze-free summer? Well, if you’ve signed up to our wonderful Over The Influence community you download our Premium Pod Mini Series called Survive The Summer and binge on all 10 episodes! Between the 3 of us we cover just about every aspect of summer drinking and how you can get through it - and, most importantly, ENJOY IT!
Mindset is key - it’s about playing it forward each time your brain tries to trick you into believing you’ll have a better time pissed. You won’t. You might have a different time than you're used to but so much will change. You won’t want to do the same things. You will never wake up in the morning feeling fresh wishing you’d got arseholed the night before. Ever.
My first sober summer was a real test - but the only way to get through it is to not drink. It’s that simple and that difficult at the same time. You don’t drink alcohol and you do something different. Anything.
I hate gardening. So I started gardening. Planting little areas that needed tidying up instead of cracking a bottle of wine.
I did more with my family and didn’t clock watch to see if it was ‘5 o clock somewhere in the world’.
I read all the quit-lit.
I slept. I walked. I stroked owls (see Premium Pod, not gone public with this one yet!).
I stocked up on AF options. When I was drinking I was all about the wine and vodka. Never touched beer or cider. Now, I can’t stomach the thought of AF wine (though I do love an AF fizz) and really enjoy an AF cider or AF beer in the garden. So if I wanted to enjoy a drink in my garden I could. With the added benefit of it not turning me in to a Grade 1 Drunken Dick.
I did something different every single time I wanted a drink - and within half an hour the feeling had passed.
This is my third sober summer - and I’ve never been more happy to be booze free. It truly is the gift that gives on giving!
Not a single minute will be wasted drinking, thinking about drinking or recovering from drinking.
There’s too much else to be doing in the sunshine.
Great this Sharon, I’m amazed how triggered I get on a sunny day, but like you said, it passes quickly. I’ve discovered AF lager with a dash of lemonade and that’s my go-to on a hot day. Xx
I actually cried too in my first few months of being AF on several different occasions . It was usually on a Friday night as my husband got home from work and cracked a beer. I was feeling bereft, I didn’t know how to be. But as I’d read all the quit lit, I hung on in there for that light they promised. I started going to a PT. Session on a Friday at 6pm instead! And I’m so glad I did as it got better and better and it’s so f***ing worth it 😄
definitely with you on this Shazza- my birthday also falls in the middle of the summer and the sun is always shining….even though this year was my 6th year AF… I was sitting by the pool, the waiter offered me a free birthday cocktail….the little voice in my head was telling me I was missing out by not having alcohol….then I ordered a delish iced coffee…I sipped it and enjoyed it….I also read a few posts on here and it’s really revitalised my AF energy and motivation so THANKYOU for OTI and all you are doing with it. We will always have these urges/ triggers, the more times we don’t give in to them I think we are moulding our…